Ashleytrouble's Blog

Whose going to the real Bamboozle? yaknow the one in Jerz?!

So I'll sit atop the staircase and listen.

I don't like what I hear.

Then again, I never do.

You always know what to say to make my tears fall fastest.

A father shouldn't have that gift.

A father should support and guide.

So why are you always so negative?

Why can't you just be happy?

Can't you see I'm suffering here?

Can't you see I just want to get away?

Can't you see I'm not the same person anymore?

You have all these concerns. That's understandable.

But how concerned will you be when I go off the deep-end?
Will you blame yourself?
Of course not. In your eyes, you can do no wrong.

Freaking out.

The End.

the first time i ever wrote a journal for this site i wrote about the grammys and how much it sucked. i remember saying how much of a popularity contest it is and how they aren't really that up to date on the artists they nominate. i mean seriously, Paramore for Best New Artist in 2008 when they've been touring their asses off since 2005? Oh! and Hey There Delilah being nominated when that song was realeased in what like 2004? 2005? Now this year the Jonas Brothers are nominated for Best New Artist and they blew up in when late 2007? So shouldn't they have been nominated in 2008? Does any of this make sense? Anywho. I will be watching this year. But only because of the rumored Blink 182 presenting an award reunion. Which if that happens I will most likely burst into tears and my mom will think I'm a total weirdo.

Lately I've been listening to Hanson and Simple Plan. Two totally different bands in two totally different times. But both having a huge impact on my life. Both have been a huge favorite at one point in my life and both I have never really had the privelege of seeing perform. I mean I saw Simple Plan at Warped Tour 2004 but I was more pre-occupied fighting for my life than actually paying attention to what they were playing. I couldn't name a single song they sang that day. haha So it has now become a personal goal for me this year to see both bands live. I was looking at Hansons myspace and lately they've been doing this 2 mile walk or something along those lines to raise money for shoes to send to people in africa. i hope i got that right. basically they walk around barefoot to raise awarness and get people to donate money for shoes for people in africa. i thought that was really cool. so basically if they ever come to chicago i'm deff. going to do the walk and maybe hopefully bring shoes to donate. if they accept donations. it's so crazy to think that 13 years ago i was 7 years old and obsessing over zac hanson and wanting to marry the guy. it will deffinately be an accomplishment to meet hanson. i hope that dream finally comes true...

well. it's grammy time. pray it wont be more commercial and ridiculous than last year. but we all know that it will.

this past week has been so crazy but I've been loving every minute of it. Thursday Christina and I went to Pop's in Sauget to see We The Kings and The Academy Is.. it was an amazing show and it made me ten times more excited to see them in Chicago. There were some issues however with some Santi's Little Helpers. For more info on that read the myspace blog.

Friday was Halloween. it was the first time in YEARS I actually was able to go out and enjoy myself. I saw so many unique costumes I loved every minute. I saw so many Jokers from Batman it was insane! Some of them were really good and scary!

Saturday was another day of relaxation and fun. We weren't sure if anyone was dressing up again to go out so we just threw on some regular outfits and if anyone asked we would say we were groupies. haha I came up with the idea. I thought it was pretty clever. We met this guy who said he went to Barrington High School and knew Adam T. Siska. He then introduced us to his friends. Two of them were twins named Charlie and Rob. I knew Rob from when I was an EIU student. We had a class together. It was crazy. I saw so many people I had classes or knew from last year. INSANE! Anywho we wound up going to their house and played beer pong. That's where I discovered I am the champion clutch beer pong player. haha

Sunday I returned home and back to my normal life full of responsibilty, worry, and work. I had a meeting at the Congress Theater. It was insane and I was incredibly tired. Melinde went with me.

Today I had work and I pretty much wanted to die. It was so dull and we were so short handed.

Tomorrow is election day. I'm really excited to vote. First year and all. I'm also going to see High School Musical 3 after class with my little cousins. I'm actually really stoked to see this movie. It looks SO GOOD! and I'm obsessed with one of the songs on the soundtrack. It's called Now or Never. Aghh idk. It's just good.

Thursday is 3OH!3 and Friday is The Academy Is... round two. I'm almost sad for the end of the week. I wish all my weeks were like this. Sadly, they are not.

Oh and if you live in the Chicagoland area...a friend of mine is playing The Next Big Thing festival on Dec. 6th at the Congress. It would mean the world to me if you came to cheer him and his band Minutes to Circle on. Tickets are $13 and I have some for sale if you're interested.

for some reason I cannot stop listening to Modest Mouse right now. things are getting to get a little hectic in my life. i started another job and was very close to quitting my retail job today. i know i take on too much for me to handle but I NEED MONEY! and how else am I going to earn it? Anyway, the job at Apple Chevy is pretty cool I guess. I'm not on my feet for 8 hours in 4 inch heels so I'm pretty excited about that. I get to wear cute outfits again! haha October seems like it's going by OH-SO-SLOWWWW! it just feels so weird because I have to much planned for this month but it feels like it's taking FOREVER to get here. I'm re-painting my room next week. I'm really excited about it. I'm going to do 3 walls white and the fourth zebra pattern. I'm getting a bigger bed too. More room to ROLL AROUND and SLEEEEP in! haha can't wait. I've got so many shows I want to go to this month it's ridiculous. im starting to think this journal is getting pretty irrelevant. so I'm just going to stop writing. this probably means I'm too tired to continue telling anyone who will read about my boring life as of now. I'm excited its starting to cool off. I love fall. I love watching the leaves change colors and when baseball goes into postseason. I really love fall when the White Sox make it to the post season. Not so much when they get knocked out by the Tampa Bay D-Rays. Oh well...maybe next year.

Yesterday I caught an Amtrak into Mattoon. I officially hate the Amtrak. Maybe I just had a bad experience but I never had any problems with it until last night. I was always able to pick up my tickets on the train with the conductor. Little did I know I had to pick up my tickets at the station. So my orginal tickets were "refunded" and I had to pay $46 bucks for a one-way ticket! I'm pissed. I might have to pay the same going back too. This sucks! To make matters worse, my train was late coming in. Regardless I made it in and the fun began.

I haven't been to Eastern in about 8 months. It felt good to be back. This place was my home for 4 months at some point in my life. It felt right this time. Last night I met Christina's roomates and some of her friends. We went to her friend Paige's apartment and played games. Some of the games they play are a bit ridickkkkk. But it was fun.

Tonight we're going to see New Found Glory at Pop's in Sauget. I'm really excited because I haven't seen New Found Glory in 10 months. And the drive down to Pop's is a lot of fun. 2 hours WEEEE!

Saturday night will hopefully be a fun night of partying. I'm hoping to see my old roomate Carol and our old friend Emily. Until then here are some pictures from last years Eastern nights...

I'm really sad. Summer officially ends for me in 48 minutes. In 48 minutes it will be midnight, August 26th, 2008 and I will have my first class of the semester at noon. This sucks! Where did summer go?! Looking back, I can't believe what an amazing summer I had. I made new friends, kept in touch with old, and re-connected with lost. I had some of the most amazing expieriences, met some of the people I admire. Between going to California and spending the weekend at Lollapalooza and Warped Tour it makes me want to cry when I realize that it's all over. I was able to end my summer with a bang though!

I WENT TO SEE THE JONAS BROTHERS LAST NIGHT!

Don't we look cute in our matching outfits?

I have a new semester resolution. Yes, they're new. I just invented them. Screw a new year, this is a new semester and I'm turning over a new leaf.

I'm no longer going to be eating fast food.

I'm gonna use my ab lounge more often.

I'm gonna try and stear clear of all meats in general.

I'm gonna save a ton of money to pay off my credit cards, my student loans, and afford a nice shopping spree for myself in November, but also be able to go to all the shows I want to.

Wish me luck! And have a good school year!

I know I went over a week ago. But it's been a busy week since I got back. Between work and going to the American Idol concert I just haven't had the time to talk about it.

I want to LIVE in California! I don't care where...EVERYWHERE just looks so BEAUTIFUL! I felt like I belonged there! And I loved spending time with my cousin! I miss her! I got to meet some new friends and enjoy a whole weekend where I didn't think about work once!

But then I had to return to Chicago and face reality. I deff. wanna go back soon. And maybe see some different parts of Cali. Like maybe Los Angeles or San Fransisco!